Simon J Blog

… Return on Investment = (The Gain from something - The Cost) / The Cost …

As you may of just seen, I’ve decided to bring this Blog back… And first up is something I thought about one morning after a night out and one of my house asked me ‘How was your night?’… I wasn’t really up for going out so the next morning I was trying to think… ‘Was it worth it?’

(I know what your thinking… this isn’t like the old posts)

But… think about it, two of the main judgments in business are the Gain and the Cost, and this can be compared to nights out. I want you to think about this as I carry on…The cost is quite a simple thing to work out… Firstly, how much you spent on the night, if your a girl then however much also you spend on a dress or something. So you can think in the morning … ok… so for example … last night cost you £60.

However, then you get onto the aspect of was it worth it? This bit is a lot harder to judge, as everybody will want different things from a night out. Whether you admit it or not, you will know if you got what you wanted from the night, maybe it would of been taking somebody home, catching up with mates, getting paralytic or even taking your top off when the Baywatch theme tune came on who knows.

I can’t answer this question for you as I don’t know your Costs or Gains for a night out, but, I want you to think about your last night out and to see if it was worth it?!

… before you get worried, not all my posts are going to be this long, this was just one I’ve taken off the top of my head…

…Some Night out facts for you…:

• The average amount of money a decent night club makes is £2,000,000 a year (Excluding door money)

• At Uni, if you had 2 x 12 week semesters (like Brookes), and went out 3 times a week over your 3 years and spent on average at least £30 (pre-lash, door, drinks, taxi, kebab kid) a night, then you spent at least £6,480 on nights out over your Uni career.

• The word Disco comes from the Latin word ‘Discomosophicas’ which where places where mental people where sent to ‘dance’ around.

Night.

After 6 months away from writing this completely inspirational  amazing … fucking stupid blog I have decided to give it a go again. Many people have asked me (mainly people passing in the street)… ‘Simon - where has the blog gone’. 

But its back… for a short time anyways until I run out of random stuff to write about.

For now…. enjoy.

p.s. as before, any ‘hot, adoring fans’ please let me know your views to be added to the wall of fame.

‘Kind Regards’ (feel like I’m writing a work e-mail - and yes my grammar is probably this bad at work as well as on here)

Simon. 

… Right, this post comes from a chat last week with a group of friends, as the convo came  about after the girls asking for the toilet seat to be put down … but this is where the issue starts… they only ask for the first section to be put down, not the whole toilet seat (which is there to hide and make the toilet seat look ‘nice’) … and me and another male (Sam) who was in the conversation found this sexist… as us men have to put down the seat… but women never have to lift up the seat for us … so in future to solve all arguments … both male & females should have to put down both seats. simple.

So now the part you’ve all be waiting for… the blogfacts time:

“The flushing toilet was invented in 1596 for Queen Elizabeth 1st…”

“The average person spends three whole years of their life on the loo…”

“The first toilet cubicle in a row is used least - and then the cleanest”… (remember that for festival season)

“The toilet is flushed more time during the super bowl halftime than any other time of the year!”

and one to gross you out….. “the toilet handle in a public restroom can have up to 40,000 germs per square inch“… rank.

So, every evening you will set your alarm for the following morning… (unless your a student and you don’t need to wake up, then you won’t have this battle)… so, the alarm is set… and the morning comes… now the battle starts! The main question is… how many times will you allow yourself to press the snooze button? you get closer and closer to the time that you actually have to leave the house… but, you continue ‘snoozing’… (ALSO… another issue…EVERY sleeping position feels like the most comfortable position in the world… which doesn’t help!) … so overall, to finish off another pointless blog, I don’t see why the snooze button was created, other than to make it TOO easy to sleep past your alarm and be late for work!

… Random Facts about the snooze button…

“the first alarm clock to have a snooze button attached came out in 1956…”

“the average person presses the snooze button 3 times every morning…”

and one about clocks … “there are no clocks in Las Vegas Casinos…”

So, I woke up this morning, was bored and decided… “what shall I do today while I have a day off” … (for some reason since I’ve finished Uni and been kept busy, I feel like I should constantly be doing something productive) … and I saw on Twitter some Music Artist advertising their tumblr. … (However, I’m sure they will have 100,000’s of hot, adoring fans caring about what they have to say ) … so I thought why not make one myself, I’m sure i’ll have at least 10 hot, adoring fans caring about what I have to say… one day, anyways … so enjoy … oh and if you are a hot, adoring fan reading this, please let me know so I know how I’m getting on…